Humility

Humility definitely attracts me. I often say – it's one thing to be good, another thing to talk about how you're good. I understand self-promotion is important at times, but I have so much more respect for the ones who never need to talk about themselves and people could just FEEL how good they are…does that make sense?

Most people (myself included) are guilty of measuring how good they are against others. Don't think that's the best motivation & measurement of one's value either…

I was just thinking this morning – how many people work hard because they want to work for the betterment of the society, and how many merely see it as an achievement of their own?

Thanks for sharing

Ruby, these are good points you bring up.

Can you really be that good if you're talking about how good you are all the time? I think no, because there's something else missing like an insecurity and need to talk about how you're so good. I also agree with Rebecca that confidence is important, we shouldn't shy away from it and I appreciate someone who owns their confidence.

Is it wrong if someone works hard for the betterment of society, but also see it as an achievement of their own?

I think this is a great quote, and I have to agree that I find humility one of the most attractive traits person can exude. Even if it's “fake” modesty, it's still very refreshing. The ego is a freaky, helter-skelter illusion that does not reflect the real essence of who we are. In situations where ego is loud and blaring, it always brings out the worst in my personality. In places and circles where humility is more pronounced, I behave and speak very differently.

For the past 7 weeks I have been unable to speak at all due to an accident and it has made me very humble. I want to use my new, emerging voice consciously and carefully.

I guess you're right… totally “fake” modesty even more annoying… when someone really does think they are better than everyone else and exudes it with every fiber of their being… but makes an artificial statement to the contrary.

but there's a kind of person who is very strong but also polite and encouraging to others.

There's a guy I read who is a world-class genius in his field. He's probably smarter than 99% of the people who flock around him. Still, he sometimes says very modest things like “Well, there's a lot of people know far, far more about this other aspect of it than I do” or he'll be encouraging to someone working on a project that's probably quite elementary to him… and I can tell he's just trying to be a nice guy and isn't as interested as he comes across.

But I think that's just being polite and genuine humility, not “fake.”

Brett, I'm sorry about your accident (I heard about it via Twitter). Interesting when you lose a sense or certain capability, what it might heighten in the interim.

However, I disagree that “fake” modesty is refreshing. The kind of humility that I find most moving is the authentic kind, when you do not need to fake it. It's hard to step away from the ego, for anyone, but to recognize that they've accepted humility into their life and still know their self-worth…ah, that is so refreshing.

Thanks for the thoughts, Brett and I hope your voice and recovery is speedy.

Brett, that definitely makes sense but you can't know if he is uninterested just because the project is elementary. He has to know that HE at one time was at that elementary space and the mentors and leaders in the field, helped him to get where he is now.

So in that, even if it's not flooring to him just by showing a little interest and help is humility and at that point, his level of interest isn't as important but that he showed the initial ability to listen and be there.

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I guess you're right… totally “fake” modesty even more annoying… when someone really does think they are better than everyone else and exudes it with every fiber of their being… but makes an artificial statement to the contrary.However,The kind of humility that I find most moving is the authentic kind, when you do not need to fake it. It's hard to step away from the ego, for anyone, but to recognize that they've accepted humility into their life and still know their self-worth…ah,Also black Gucci work great with jeans, and give a very casual, or rugged look, that is so refreshing.However, I disagree that “fake” modesty is refreshing. The kind of humility that I find most moving is the authentic kind, when you do not need to fake it. It's hard to step away from the ego, for anyone, but to recognize that they've accepted humility into their life and still know their self-worth…ah, that is so refreshing.Christian Louboutin shoes look fantastic with tight-legged jeans tucked into them, or with short skirts paired with opaque tights or bare legs.

These entries are absolutely wonderful! I’m new to to the blog world and this is just the TLC I needed today. I know it’s a little after the fact, being the last post was a year ago (HAH), but I hope no one minds I leave a few notes. This is just such a terrific topic!
I couldn’t agree more with you Grace. There is something truly inspiring about being around someone with an air of humility that can only come from knowing ones place through failure but coupled with the confidence that comes from knowing what one has attained through his/her own toil. I’m a classical musician. When I tell people what I do their first response usually hints along the lines of ‘ok, so what do you do to make money again?’ This may contribute to why so many classical musicians, I can’t speak for any other artists, feel a need to turn their noses up in order to defend their worth. It’s like there’s nothing for them to stand on but what they think of themselves and what they’ve achieved in the practice room for that one glorifying audition.

In response to Rebecca’s post: I like your observation! Though, I wonder who the majority of people who react poorly to ‘blog confidence’ do outside of blogging? What do THEY have to stand on? Being a teacher as well, I see so many students who are looking for their place. Some more confident than others. And one of the main contributing factors seems to be how we as people measure our own self worth. Some students are go getters. But others, seem to have this timidness about them that’s just a call for a little guidance. Give them a few good tips, and some easy obstacles to overcome sprinkled with a little congratulations and they begin to bloom! Their confidence builds and their excitement for what they FEEL they can DO next is inspiring.

I found my confidence in my own study and toil as a musician. I grew up with A.D.D. that plagued my grades and self control in elementary school. Music was a venue I cared more about than anything, and because I did it became a means I could measure and improve myself in all areas from academics, physique, nutrition, life skills, and most recently Humility. Even though I’m completely aware of it, I know my ego has a tendency to get in the way. It’s such a pain. It tries to offer me ideas in my work rather than listening to others and when it gets knocked down, like today, playing is the easiest thing in the world. I mention this because (going back to what Rebecca was saying) there’s seems to be this uncanny human need to verify ones own self worth. Whether it be criticizing over blogging or measuring yourself against another in the workplace. We all experience it. BUT, then there are those who seem to have no need for it. Those whom we gravitate towards who because they possibly have what we wish we had. That presence of “talent, strength, and intellect” in the office that Grace mentions. That “quiet confidence” that I have seen amongst the top orchestral musicians in the field who have attained the sense and control of olympic athletes (there I go verifying MY field. Lol.). Those who seem to have obtained high ranking positions but at a cost. I was wondering myself if there was anything I could do on a daily basis that could help knock down that ego? I wonder if it’s something one can just learn though. Like I mentioned earlier, “at a cost” right? Maybe a person has to get kicked in the arse a bit by life to acquire a humility/appreciation for it? I doubt it’s one of those “a-hah!” moments. But, I wonder if it’s something that can simply be earned over time or if it’s just time that is a constant reminder? Either way, it may take some living. What do ya’ll think?

Thank you for all of your entries. They are just wonderful!

Yeah, quiet confidence is the best kind. This could be in a partner, boss, friend, etc. It’s endearing!

My boss/mentor and I were talking about humility this morning and I remembered this quote, so I went back to find it and sent it his way. Liked it again, timeless, so I tweeted and here you are